It never ceases to amaze me, how the thread of running away from the pain we know is inside of us, causes such destruction in our lives. I often wonder if only we learned at a young age to befriend our inner pain and not run from it, how different our lives would be. Imagine being conditioned to feel comfortable with crying, with facing our fears, with feeling the pain of grief. With all manner of pain we experience as a result of being human. Instead, we run. We turn away from our inside world, time and time again, too afraid to feel. What person cannot relate to this.
It takes a guide to explain to us that we will survive it. That it is necessary. That it is simply our humanity. That there is gold to be discovered or made out of this pain. That this pain will not kill us. Will not overcome us. We need to be told and educated on how to experience our inner selves, pain and all, so that we may be made into something new. Maybe even something of value to others.
When I say pain, I am describing the 'felt sense' right inside of our bodies. The sensory experience of discomfort, sharpness, heaviness, pain. The sensation that our heart has actually just broken. The physical feeling that we might actually die from this physical agony of our emotional pain. There is no easy way around this. The pain must be felt. Felt. Experienced. And that is how we transform it.
It is a hard sell to my Clients! People come to see me, and pay me good money, to feel better. And my aim is to guide them into inside of themselves. A place of self-reflection and self-knowledge. A place inside, where pain and suffering will undoubtedly surface. And with time and love, these painful experiences get changed and made into something beautiful. Something invaluable.
Two things can help me sell it! First, ask yourself this. What is the avoidance of this pain costing me? Second, what is to be gained from doing the seemingly 'unnatural' thing of running towards my pain? Some answers may include, and often do include the following; I am in full blown addiction because I am running, I have destroyed my marriage because of my running, I have no real friends because of my running, I am depressed and bored because of my running, I feel nothing because of my running. And what's to be gained?
Life, love, integrity, you might start to like yourself, you might feel happy to be alive again, you might even start feeling a bit of hope! You might start to feel pretty fantastic. You might just go and create a wonderful new life for yourself, one filled with all the things you had once upon a time hoped for. Convinced?....