I think when I reflect on my own strategies and the strategies of my clients over the years, the approach that we all inherently take is extremely varied and nuanced. I have seen and heard and personally experienced unbelievable coping behaviour, approaches, philosophies, fantasies, healthy and unhealthy. All to just survive life, alone.
I really have a problem with a lot of the content on social media that categorises 'healthy' and 'unhealthy', 'good' and 'bad', 'right' and 'wrong'. No one is in a position to judge anyone else. No therapist or so called expert. The best neuroscientists in the world, the leading research neuroscientists who also moonlight as Therapist's and Psychiatrist's will all easily admit, psychology, psychotherapy and psychiatry all have extremely limited true understanding of what is actually going on for everyone. We know so little. Fact. I agree. We are all surviving, trying to move into a place of thriving. We cope and survive in whatever way we can. No judgment.
Thankfully, we are entering an age of mental health information overload. It is both extremely helpful and unhelpful. But extremely helpful overall I think! We are all talking about Trauma. There are unlimited resources and information that simply where not there a few years ago. Most people's algorithms are tuned to teaching them about mental health, because we are all interested. Why are we interested? Because life is tough. We are all carrying trauma. We are all in it together.
However, one drawback, is this. The lack or wisdom. The lack of personal insight. How to apply the information. It's like we have all the material. But we don't have the space in our lives and inside of our selves, to utilise the content we are ingesting.
So as we move out of addiction, denial, PTSD, hiding, using a relationship as a crutch, being the victim, being the willing participant in abuse, using a false personality, etc., and we are aiming for peace and happiness for ourselves, we must have space to find ourselves. We still need space and time. We still need a listening friend or therapist. We need to talk and share. We need connection. We need to put our phones down. We need to limit our social media diet. We need to sit still. Sit alone. Sit for a while. Walk for a while. Be alone. All this kind of thing. We need a landscape inside and out to apply the information. We still need to do the work.
